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‘Dek je baby niet af met dekentje in kinderwagen’

Dekentje
Het dekentje waaronder baby Sloan sliep, is gemaakt door zijn overgrootmoeder. ‘Hij slaapt er al sinds zijn geboorte mee. Op de één of andere manier is het fout gegaan en raakte hij erin verstrikt’, vertelt Jordan. ‘Hij was zeven maanden oud, hij kroop, kon rechtstaan en klimmen. Ik dacht dat het oké was om een deken te geven’.

Schuldgevoel
Drie dagen geleden trof Jordan haar kind levenloos aan in zijn bedje. Ambulancebroeders hebben nog geprobeerd om het kind te reanimeren, maar dat mocht niet meer baten. De moeder geeft zichzelf de schuld van haar baby, en vertelde daarom niet meteen op Instagram dat hij gestikt was in zijn deken. Bij haar foto schrijft ze: ‘Dit is het gezicht van onwaarschijnlijk verdriet, van verlangen, van een gebroken hart en van schuldgevoel. Ik zal me altijd schuldig voelen en zal die momenten voor de rest van mijn leven herbeleven’.

Waarschuwing
Met haar post wil Jordan andere ouders waarschuwen: geef je kind niet te vroeg een deken. ‘We moeten nu allemaal manieren vinden om zonder hem te leven’. Volgens Veiligheid.nl kunnen kinderen jonger dan twee jaar het beste in een babyslaapzak of onder een deken met laken slapen, mits het bedje strak is opgemaakt. Zo kan een baby niet verstrikt raken.

Our sweet rainbow boy is gone. I don’t even have words to explain the immense hole in our hearts right now. This morning I went into his room just after 9:40 am to check on him. He was face down and unresponsive in his crib. I yanked him upright and I screamed for Justin. He grabbed him and held him while we both screamed for what felt like an eternity. Our neighbors heard us and came in to help administer CPR while Justin called 911. I called my mother and Kailynn sobbing asking them to come. By the time paramedics arrived it had been 20 minutes since we found him. They tried for about a half hour to revive him but were unsuccessful. One of the paramedics had gone through the same thing with his infant son several years ago and sat down on the floor with us to tell us it was too late, he was gone. I asked to hold him and have been sitting here with him wrapped in his rainbow blanket for hours while people filter in and out. Detectives had to get statements, chaplains had to explain what happens “after”, paramedics didn’t want to leave, most of them in tears as well. He looks like he is sleeping, but he doesn’t feel like him anymore. If you’ve ever lost a child you understand that there’s an unimaginable guilt you feel. I should have checked on him in the night. I shouldn’t have laid awake in bed this morning instead of going to get him. I should have I should have I should have….nothin can bring him back, and yet you still try and find all of the ways you could have prevented it. Sloan was the happiest, smiliest baby, he lit up everyone’s lives who knew him and we were so blessed by his short life. We must find the ways to grieve and live without him.

Een bericht gedeeld door Jordan DeRosier (@lifeofderosiers) op 3 Jul 2017 om 1:10 PDT

To those who keep commenting and messaging trying to blame vaccines for our sons death- stop. He was last laid down to bed with this blanket made by his great-great grandmother, and one other blanket, a grey one he had been attached to since birth. They took the grey one he had been found with his head in. He had pulled it through the crib rails somehow and gotten himself stuck in it. You never think it will happen to you. You never think it will be your baby. Please do not put your babies to bed with a blanket. Please. He was 7 months old, I thought because he was crawling, standing on his own, and climbing, that he would be fine with a blanket. This is the face of immense, unfathomable grief, the face of longing, of heartbreak, of self inflicted GUILT. I will NEVER stop feeling responsible. I will relive this for the rest of my life.

Een bericht gedeeld door Jordan DeRosier (@lifeofderosiers) op 4 Jul 2017 om 6:21 PDT